As an Adult, What Could be the Signs of Undiagnosed ADHD and How Can I Get Support?

Recognising Adult ADHD and Taking Empowering Steps Toward Help

For many adults, the image of Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is often one rooted in childhood: stories of restless children unable to sit still in class, or struggling to complete their homework.

However, ADHD is not confined to the years of youth. A substantial number of adults live with undiagnosed ADHD, quietly battling symptoms that disrupt daily life, relationships, and self-esteem. If you suspect that you or someone you care about might be experiencing undiagnosed ADHD; understanding the signs and seeking support can be transformative.

Understanding Adult ADHD: More Than Just ‘Hyperactivity’

ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder, meaning it influences the way the brain grows and functions. While its name underscores attention and hyperactivity, the condition is far more nuanced in adults. Hyperactivity may appear as restlessness or an inability to relax, while inattention and impulsivity often take centre stage. Many adults with ADHD have spent years attributing their challenges to personality flaws, laziness, or a lack of willpower.

Common Signs of Undiagnosed ADHD in Adults

ADHD manifests differently in everyone, but there are some common patterns that can help you identify if you might be affected:

·       Chronic Disorganisation: Consistently losing items, forgetting appointments, or struggling to keep your workspace tidy.

·       Persistent Procrastination: Difficulty starting tasks, even when you know they’re important.

·       Poor Time Management: Struggling to estimate how long tasks will take, often running late or missing deadlines.

·       Impulsivity: Making decisions quickly without considering consequences, frequent interrupting, or difficulty waiting your turn.

·       Distractibility: Difficulty focusing on conversations, reading, or tasks—especially ones that aren’t stimulating or engaging.

·       Restlessness: Feeling an internal sense of restlessness, even if you’re not physically moving.

·       Emotional Dysregulation: Experiencing intense emotions, rapid mood swings, sensitivity to criticism, or difficulty managing frustration.

·       Poor Working Memory: Forgetting what was just said in a conversation, misplacing everyday objects, or having trouble following complex instructions.

·       Relationship Difficulties: Challenges in relationships due to missed commitments, inattention, or impulsive remarks.

·       Low Self-Esteem: A lifelong sense of underachievement, shame, or feeling “different” , without understanding why.

It’s important to note that everyone experiences some of these behaviours at times. But ADHD involves a consistent, long-term pattern that disrupts your life across multiple settings—work, home, relationships, and personal well-being.

Why Is ADHD Often Undiagnosed in Adults?

Many adults with ADHD never suspect they have it. There are several reasons for this:

·       In childhood, their symptoms may have been mild, masked by intellect, or misunderstood as a behaviour issue.

·       Symptoms can shift with age; hyperactivity often becomes internal restlessness, and difficulties with attention may be mistaken for anxiety or depression.

·       Social stigma surrounding mental health and neurodiversity can discourage people from seeking help.

·       Women and people assigned female at birth are often underdiagnosed, as their symptoms may present more as inattention or emotional difficulties than hyperactivity.

Recognising these patterns is a crucial first step to seeking help.

Practical First Steps for Seeking Support

Discovering you may have ADHD as an adult can be both daunting and empowering. Here’s how you can begin your journey toward understanding and support:

1. Educate Yourself

Learn about ADHD from credible sources. Understanding symptoms, causes, and treatment options can help you articulate your experiences and advocate for yourself.

2. Track Your Symptoms

Keep a journal or use an App to note your experiences, challenges, and how they impact your daily life. This can help identify patterns and provide valuable information for professionals.

3. Seek a Professional Assessment

Contact your general practitioner (GP) or a mental health specialist for an evaluation. Adult ADHD assessments often involve questionnaires, interviews, and sometimes input from people who know you well. It’s important to be honest about your struggles, even if they feel embarrassing or minor.

4. Explore Treatment Options

Treatment plans can include a combination of strategies such as:

·       Medication: Stimulant and non-stimulant medications are commonly prescribed and can be very effective.

·       Therapy: Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), coaching, and psychoeducation can all help you manage symptoms and develop coping strategies.

·       Lifestyle Changes: Regular exercise, adequate sleep, structured routines, and organisational tools can have a significant impact.

5. Involve Your Support Network

Let trusted friends, family, or colleagues know what you’re experiencing. Their understanding and encouragement can make a tremendous difference.

Finding Emotional Support

Receiving or even considering an ADHD diagnosis as an adult may bring a mix of relief, grief, and uncertainty. Emotional support is vital in navigating this transition:

·       Connect with Others: Join support groups—both online and in-person—where you can share experiences and learn from others’ journeys. Knowing you’re not alone can reduce feelings of isolation and shame.

·       Practice Self-Compassion: Remind yourself that ADHD is not a character flaw or weakness. Be gentle with yourself as you process past challenges and move forward.

·       Seek Professional Guidance: Therapists or counsellors can help you work through emotions related to your diagnosis and build self-esteem.

·       Focus on Strengths: Many adults with ADHD are creative, resourceful, and passionate. Celebrate your unique qualities, and look for ways they can become assets in your personal and professional life.

Moving Forward: Thriving with ADHD

A diagnosis of ADHD in adulthood isn’t an ending—it’s a doorway to understanding yourself better and making positive changes. With the right support, structures, and self-compassion, you can build a life that plays to your strengths rather than being held back by unseen challenges.

Additional Resources

·       ADHD UK: adhd.org.uk

·       CHADD (Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder): chadd.org

·       ADDitude Magazine: additudemag.com

·       Mental Health Foundation: mentalhealth.org.uk

If you suspect you may have ADHD, know that you are not alone. Many adults are discovering, often for the first time, that their lifelong struggles have a name—and that effective, compassionate help is available.

Reaching out for support is not a sign of weakness; it is a courageous step toward a more fulfilled and balanced life.